November 07, 2022
Kerry’s mission is to help others find a more balanced and fulfilled life. She believes in action and has created a system that is easy to implement so that people can create change quickly. Kerry teaches Simple Tips for Extraordinary Living using stress reduction techniques and work-life balance to help people supercharge their lives. She coaches corporate clients and elite athletes in mindset and peak performance techniques and creates tailored programs for private clients who are seeking mastery in all areas of their lives.
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This is a production of km media dot Pro. Welcome back to positive talk radio. Our goal is simple to explore evolving ideas one conversation at a time. So come on over into our world, I know you'll like it. Because on today's show, Today we're featuring our great lady who's a coach, as been a lawyer, so she might be able to do some Anyway, she's been a lawyer, she's a mother of five, she does all kinds of great things. But before we go there, I have to talk to Benny real quick, because, as hopefully everybody knows by now, the show is moving from 9am to 3pm. Monday afternoon.
Unknown Speaker 0:57
I'm leaving for many behind. But I just wanted to say that, Benny, you are have always been for the last What is it been 19 years?
Unknown Speaker 1:06
Well, yeah, it's still gonna continue just not during my time slot is producing here at the mighty 1150. So it's all good. You'll still be a part of our family. I just won't get to see you on the daily morning routine.
Unknown Speaker 1:16
Exactly. But just wanted to share with everybody that you are well, here, let me do this. Ah, thank you. Amazing producer does a fabulous job for all the shows that he works. And I just wanted to say thank you, you've added a lot to our show. And it's just because I have trouble getting up in the morning. That's well, you know, it works out really well.
Unknown Speaker 1:44
It's my pleasure. I did offer in the beginning like a wake up call. But you're like, No, no, no, I could do it myself. It's all good. What's not a
Unknown Speaker 1:50
matter of just getting a matter of actually being like coherence at this time of day. A night owl. So I stay up till you know, late. So yeah, I'm
Unknown Speaker 2:03
not you know, and I have to because I've been doing this for 20 years. So I know. 330 is very early for most folk. But that is my routine. And that's what I've been doing. So I like it. But I go to bed early too. So it's all good to 330
Unknown Speaker 2:15
in the morning. Yes, sir. That's just that's just something in any event, Carrie Fisher's Carrie Fisher is our guest today. And she is a remarkable lady. She's been on the podcast before you can go to mind positive talk radio. I can see that's why I can't do mornings. Father's talk radio
Unknown Speaker 2:35
show. You still don't need me anymore.
Unknown Speaker 2:40
Work? I do I do. But on the flip side, I get to have Eric back in this room. And I did. I worked with him for almost a year. So it was but I love all you guys. I just got to tell you that that. The three of you both Nathan, both all three of you, Nathan, Eric, and you do a remarkable job. Thank you. It makes us amateur sound actually reasonably professional. Well,
Unknown Speaker 3:08
we appreciate that. And we're here for you, guys.
Unknown Speaker 3:11
I appreciate that. I appreciate you guys. So I want to thank you for that. All right. So Carrie, it's so nice to see you today. How are ya? Where are you? I am in New
Unknown Speaker 3:20
York. It's great to see you too. Kevin. I cannot believe that he wakes up and goes to work at 330 every morning. That is crazy.
Unknown Speaker 3:28
That's That's hard to believe it's hard to believe that that he doesn't miss because he I would miss it by like four hours if I was to sleep over.
Unknown Speaker 3:37
In my defense, I have missed a couple shows in the 20 years I've might have I of course I mean, no one's perfect. I mean, I might have bailed. Well, I'm not gonna get into the logistics or the May there might have been a crazy night before. And I was like slept through an alarm or to it happens. Wow. And that's
Unknown Speaker 3:55
a problem when you get up at 330 in the morning. And on Sunday night. If you did go out with friends or or go to a party or something and then you're supposed to leave at like 738 o'clock at night. That's just when the party is getting started. So generally, yeah. So
Unknown Speaker 4:13
I don't know what parties you're going. All hours playing. That is not typical.
Unknown Speaker 4:22
Well, I'm actually reminding myself on my youth. Because I haven't been doing that in years.
Unknown Speaker 4:30
So remind me not to invite Kevin over on a Sunday night.
Unknown Speaker 4:33
Exactly. It's party time. Let's play. And by the way, Carrie I just want you to know that I get a lot of comments from people that listen to the show here on KK and W and the podcast that I have some of the most incredible guests and some people that are very, very interesting to talk to and you are one of those. And so I just wanted to let everybody know that this is going to be an extra On the show, and you do an excellent job of what you do. And so what I like you to do is to tell my audience and our friends out there what it is exactly that you do do.
Unknown Speaker 5:11
What I do do,
Unknown Speaker 5:12
what do you? Yeah. Anyway,
Unknown Speaker 5:16
what I mainly do now is, this past year, I've taken the year to just write because I always had wanted to be a published author. So I dedicated the year to writing and I already published my first book, my second book will be published soon. So before that, though, before I dedicated this full year to the writing, I've been a coach. And I really consider myself mostly a Wellness Educator. So I love to learn, I love to study about all of these different mindfulness techniques. I like to subtract out the lingo make it simple, and, you know, teach people how to bring some of these different practices into their life, that might seem a little unusual. Sometimes people will be scared if they hear about breathwork, or meditation. But I like to take away all of the mystery and just show you how these tools are actually really helpful, even in modern times, to keep you calm and stress free. So I basically teach you how to become the best version of yourself. So you could live the most extraordinary life that you can dream up. And a
Unknown Speaker 6:27
lot of us have that in mind that we would like to be able to do that we just have got no idea how I'll give you an example before, before I started getting into some alternative spirituality and stuff. I was a strict Lutheran. And meditation was considered bad. Yeah, and even even evil. And you know, but in I don't understand. I guess it's because they don't understand what it actually is. But I didn't understand when I started getting into it, why we had such a negative connotation for some people. People get
Unknown Speaker 7:05
very nervous. You know, right before the pandemic, I was working at an elite high school, I was training the athletes and peak performance and mindset. So I worked with some of the teams. And what's really interesting is because it's a Catholic school, this high school, they were very worried about meditation. So what I did was I taught the meditation, but I didn't call it meditation. I just called it stress relieving techniques, because people get hung up on the buzzwords, you know, mindfulness and meditation pranayama, which is really breath work and all these different words that they hear. And I think it turns people off, because they're like, What is that, you know, and the reason people get especially worried I think about meditation is that for whatever the reason they equate that with religion, but has nothing to do with religion, meditation is really just sitting and paying attention to what you're thinking about. So there's really nothing spiritual about it.
Unknown Speaker 8:02
You know, I've talked to a lot of guys, including people like John Edward, and he'll say that who's the psychic medium, and he'll say that because before he goes to work, he will do meditation and prayer. And so in many cases, you can take the one word meditation, and substituted with prayer and accomplish the same things, can't you?
Unknown Speaker 8:24
Of course, and what I really think is, there's so many different kinds of meditation also. So the one problem is people equate it with religion, which it's not while meditation is, is sitting quietly, and either paying attention to your thoughts or attempting to clear your mind. But that's, that's what the other problem is, people get a little bit confused, because they think the only way they can meditate is sit there with their, you know, fingers in a circle, you know, on the ground with their legs crossed like Buddha. And that's really not the only way to meditate. Another way to meditate is sitting on a chair, listening to a guided meditation by somebody. So for me, I enjoy the guided meditations because I want to use my meditation to make my life better. I'm not doing meditation to get good at meditation, I'm using meditation to get get better at life.
Unknown Speaker 9:12
You know, I actually have a guided meditation that we've had up for almost 20 years now. And it's really, really good. So I encourage you to go to positive talk radio dotnet and, and search for guided meditation. And you have one Kevin, did you make it? I had a friend of mine do it. And he did it a long, long time ago, but it's about grounding. And it's about grounding to Mother Earth and also connecting to to our higher self, and, and being being cognizant of those things. And so it really is a really cool thing. And it's been downloaded, I don't know 1000s of times.
Unknown Speaker 9:51
Wow, that's so cool. I'll make you another meditation, maybe like a gratitude meditation. I love meditation, because once you start really diving into these guys meditations, there's so many apps first of all that you can get, you can even go on YouTube, there's so much free material free content, or you could take a course you could buy a book, there's so many different options. But um, what I really love is that you could have so many different choices. So say you join one of these meditation apps, you could do a meditation on gratitude, you could do in like, say, you're going through a difficult time in life, you could do a meditation on sadness, you could do a meditation on compassion, you know, say, You're angry with someone, you could do a meditation on forgiveness. So beginning to use meditation, and all of these different wellness practices to make your life better, I think is just such a powerful way to go about using these tools, you know, and you know, what I always say to like, I don't even care if it like technically works or not, if I'm doing something, and I'm seeing progress in my life. That's all the proof I personally need, you know,
Unknown Speaker 10:53
exactly. And you can even meditate about grief, because we all have got a lot of grief surrounding us. And you can meditate about that and feel a little bit better about your, your situation and what's happening in your life.
Unknown Speaker 11:09
Yeah, and you know, what's really interesting. So I know, one of the things that I noticed that so I was an attorney. And then I eventually started teaching yoga. And that morphed into coaching and teaching peak performance and mindset. And what I noticed is in the wellness, world, one, they have all the buzzwords, and I think that really scares people off. You know, it's like just these, it's really marketing terms, I really would like to say they're just like buzzwords to get people interested in whatever product the person is selling. But what I also noticed is they people would want you to do a lot of hours of mindfulness every day, you know, like, wake up and meditate for 45 minutes, and then do breath work for 15 minutes. And now I'm going to first do yoga, and I'm going to exercise I'm going to drink my green smoothie, now I have to drink eight glasses of water. And you know, before you know what my whole day has gone by being so mindful, you know, and I can't even function. So I wanted to take all the tools and make them simple, because I really do believe maybe you agree, Kevin, that you can change your life in five minutes, you know, especially if you do that five minutes today. And then again tomorrow, and then again the next day. And you just keep doing that. And I'm not saying overnight, things change. But slowly over time, you will find change when you make it easy on yourself. And when you build in success. So if I make a goal, okay, five minutes a day, I'm gonna meditate and I hit that goal, I feel good about myself. And guess what, I'm gonna meditate more. So I like to build in the success and make it simple.
Unknown Speaker 12:41
I love the fact that you work with athletes, especially especially high school athletes, because they're trying to get to be the best that they can be. And when I was when I was in athletics, goes back into the 70s. They didn't talk about anything like that. But now they're finding out that it does improve performance. It can allows you to remain calm when you're in a stressful situation, especially on the athletic field. And you can also visualize success that you are going to create, and it makes it a lot better is that is that been your experience? Have you been able to help young athletes do better at their at their craft? Because of the meditation and mindfulness and, and, and, and visual visualization?
Unknown Speaker 13:38
Absolutely. And I don't even call it any of those things. I just tell them, Oh, we're going to do this activity now or we're going to try this technique. You know, so for the athletes, originally, when I first started working with athletes, the way I got into it's hard to get into the schools, you know, yeah, so I couldn't do it as meditation because no one wants that they were very stressed about that idea, or anything to do with yoga, you know, so I said, Oh, let me come in and do like, it's sort of like yoga but it's more like stretching because since they do a lot of physical activity, they do a lot of weight training, I said oh, it's really important for them to stretch and have that part of themselves flexing of the flexibility as well. And what was interesting is at the beginning and end of every class, I would teach and this this would be like 100 boys you know Kevin like the football team I would have in they are just me trying to deal with you know, the 100 football players and you know, keep them all in line. But at the beginning and end I would always speak to them and at the end I would always run them through a visualization of their next game. Okay, is it on your field imagine the field imagine lacing up your shoes, I would have them go through the whole entire game and make it a perfect game. And the kids started asking me you're talking about like 1718 year old these like big huge apple you know, athletic guys like Carrie, can you do more of that? It, you know, that stuff you do at the end? So I was like, Oh, what do you mean, and they're like that talking stuff you do, because they were loving the not just the visualizations, but a lot of the stuff, what I would do with them was stress relieving techniques. So like, you know, for things they could do before they take a test, how they could just close their eyes and breathe, you know, concentrate on their breathing. So I was actually amazed that such young children themselves understood the power of the visualizations, because they would come back after the game and be like, Oh, it was like, I had already been there, you know, because they had visualize the game before the game. And they Oh, it always improved their performance. But what helped them the most was having the stress reduction techniques for before the game, right, or like the night before the morning of right before going on the field, you know, end for athletes, what's really important is they need to learn how to put behind them any defeat, you know, so if they're out there, and they have a bad play, you want to teach them, you need to let that go and keep moving forward. So there's so many ways that mindfulness helps athletes. And actually, athletes have been using all these mindful techniques for many, many years, it just was more in the professional world. And it wasn't really known about as much all of the athletes who have a professional trainer, they are all doing all these techniques for many years, and a lot of the professional teams are now bringing mindfulness techniques, all of these things to these teams, which is amazing. So it absolutely could help not just athletes, but it could help everybody, it could help any human, it could help a corporate person, it could help an attorney, it could help a business person, it could help a mom, it could help a dad, it could help you know, a super supermarket salesperson, it could help anyone, because it's just ways for you to gain control of yourself, again, you know, gain control of your mind and keep yourself in a positive headspace.
Unknown Speaker 16:50
Well, you know, if you're, if you are saying to yourself, I don't know about this carry, I don't know whether that's, you know, next time that you have the opportunity to watch a professional golfer, line up and get ready to tee off, you'll see him stand behind the ball, and he'll look out towards the fairway and where he's going. And what he's doing is visualizing the perfect shot on the perfect swing, where the ball is going to go. They've been doing that for years. And so it's been it's been a very important aspect of what they do. But you also work with physiology, and with with anatomy, and stuff, and athletes get a lot of soft tissue injuries, yeah, hamstrings and grinds, and all that, where the yoga or the stretching can help them stay away from those soft tissue injuries.
Unknown Speaker 17:52
Well, it's so interesting, because I feel like athletes need to do yoga or stretching, you know, they need the flexibility because they're already strong. And then people who do a lot of yoga or flexibility work, they actually need to do strength training, because they're hyper flexible, which is not good. So you really want a balance of the the movement, the exercise, like strength training, and the yoga and I think it's I think it's true, not just of your body though, Kevin, right. You want to be flexible, you know, in your, in your mind, you know, and strong in your mind and your spirit and all of the ways you know. So I think it's, it's really important to remember that we have control over how we feel and how we think in every moment. And we actually are constructing our lives. And that's what this is really all about. You know, and I love what you're saying about the golfers they are they're looking for the perfect shot, they already have the muscle memory because they practice so much with their physical body. They're getting the mental memory, you know, so what they did was they they taught athletes that if they could just practice their routine or practice the shot over and over and over again, that that will actually help them almost as much as practicing in real life. You know, so it's pretty incredible. You know, who actually practice this technique was Bruce Jenner, which I was actually very surprised to find out. So I don't know if you remember when he was like decathletes. You remember that? Kevin? Sure. Sure. We're young. He was like, the most gorgeous, like muscular, you know, greatest athlete in the world. 10 events. And I heard recently a speech with her I mean, an interview with him. And he every single night before bed would go through every one of his events. Isn't that crazy? And you know who else did that? Spit? Who was the? Yeah, Mark Spitz, who originally had like the most awards up until Phelps came along. He did the same thing. He would imagine his event. If you watch Michael Phelps before he actually ever would compete. He has his headphones on the has a specific playlist he listens to, he wakes up the day of his game. And he has a specific routine he does he does not veer off of it. And he, you know, he visualizes his events and he has a very specific practice that he does, because he has everything lined up the physical, the mental, the emotional. And that's what we can do to, I could be a mom of five, which I am sitting in my kitchen, instead of losing my temper, I could remember, Oh, I could do a breath work right now I could just quickly breathe, and feel a little better. So these things are applicable to every human, you know, and that's why they've been around for so long, you know, and I really wish that people would stop being so fearful of trying them or think, oh, that's just some, you know, secret, like spiritual woowoo nonsense, and really try the things because they're all very practical tools.
Unknown Speaker 20:49
Oh, absolutely. Now, I got to ask you, though, at one point, you had gone through law school, you became a lawyer, you got married, you had five kids? What motivated you to completely upend your life to do because, you know, being a lawyer, at least from a layman's point of view. They do very, very well. What motivated you to change everything about you to doing what you're doing. Now?
Unknown Speaker 21:16
You know why? Because I've always been interested in studying in the wellness world, I've always loved it since I was a teenager. So my parents divorced when I was very young. So I was always on like, a personal transformation path. I was always like seeking the answers. You know, why? Why all the answers, Kevin, because I really did. I had like a lot of issues from my parents divorce, even though I was really young when it happened. So I went on this path of searching, I used to study philosophy and sociology and psychology, you name it, and I studied it. And then I became an attorney. And I, you know, had kids and I settled down, I had the traditional life. And I realized that one day, I wasn't happy, even though I had every single thing that you could check on your list. I have a nice house, I travel I have my children I have, you know, I'm married, I have everything I need. And I wasn't happy. And I was like, well, that's interesting. Why is that? And the reason was, was because when I was young, I had decided what I wanted to do, but I never really revisited that. I never said to myself at 40 and at 45. And at 50. Carrie, what do you want to do? You know? So I think I was in my early 40s, when I realized, you know, I'm not really that happy. And what I really wanted to do was to help people, right, so even though I was in law, I never really felt like I was helping people. It's a lot of paperwork. It's not exactly what you think, law, you know, it's a lot of clerical stuff, you know. So anyway, I decided to start teaching yoga, and I just loved it. I felt like I was helping people, I felt good. And eventually I had enough work that I could leave law and go into the yoga and then that morphed into coaching. But I feel like even now, you know, I decided to take a year off and start writing this year. And there's a lot of questions with that, you know, like I could go back into doing my corporate coaching and working with athletes right now, since everything's opening up right now. Right? So right now is a good time for me to go back in and, you know, reestablish myself before everybody else does. It's pretty competitive in that world. But I decided to take a year off and do some writing because I always asked myself now all the time, daily, almost like, is this what I want to be doing with my life? I want to live my life where I'm always moving forward. I don't want to stagnate. You know, it's actually pretty interesting, Kevin, because he fought me out an interesting hobby shouldn't talk about my mom, but she'll probably never hear this podcast, but my parents are. It's actually funny. After I wrote my first book, my sister was like, you know, you wrote some stuff about our family. And I'm like, I didn't even think about that. And I'm like, Well, you're not gonna like the second book because I wrote even more stuff about the family. I mean, you definitely not gonna like my magnum opus, because I'm going to talk about everything about the family that ends already better prepared themselves. But you know, my mom and dad, my mum and stepdad their ad, and my mom is getting a divorce. So it's actually brought up a lot of like emotion for me and upheaval and needing to use all my tools that I'm always talking about Gavin, I actually like, actually, these tools don't work. Now they do work. But what I realized though, is I guess my mom must have shown me this. If you're not happy. Go find another life who at 80 years old, I can't imagine. My mom is the one who left me dad too. And she moved away. She moved two hours away. So at 80 years old, my mom is willing to start a whole new life. Right and it's like, it's like so crazy to me that someone would be that brave and like live really moved to a new town. She really doesn't know anyone she knows a couple of people who live nearby. And I was like, that's pretty bold. So I think that my mom must have taught me how to live full out like this, you know,
Unknown Speaker 25:11
I really believe that because the same honestly, the same darn thing happened to me when I was in my early 40s, which was I was in the corporate world, and I had a good paying job. And I had the house, I had the picket fence, I had the dogs, I had the kids, I had, you know, the, the social groups and all that stuff that I was part of, and, and, but I woke up one day, and it was like, it's not enough. I don't feel like, I don't feel like I'm accomplishing anything of what I should be doing. And or couldn't be doing
Unknown Speaker 25:43
or like, is this all it is? It's almost like, exactly, like, is this what I'm gonna do?
Unknown Speaker 25:49
Is this is this all there isn't and, and why can't I find out what it is that I really truly am called to do?
Unknown Speaker 25:58
Because I feel it's almost like the golfer but we like something like I like to look down my life and be like, am I gonna get up every day and do this for the rest of my life. Exactly. Much designs upset with my mom, because I feel like abandoned a little bit even at my age, which is ridiculous. But I was also like, this is a really powerful lesson, you know that. There's, you're never too there's never an excuse really, for being unhappy in your life. If but it's a bold move. So like what happened with you, you decided to walk away from everything,
Unknown Speaker 26:29
I quit the corporate world, I decided I was going to do a radio show. And it was at that time, originally was called Spirit talk. Because we wanted to talk about meditation, we want to talk about spiritual things, and ended up turning into positive talk radio, which I did for two hours a day, 11 months in 2003. And which led me into a whole series of different experiences and life things that happened after that until I was able to come back and do this, again. Because this is where my heart is. This is where I really, I mean, to me talking to people like you who you and me can help somebody who's listening the audience, find their path, and feel good about who they are. Because you know, quite frankly, I'm 65. Now, my brother died in 64. He was my older brother. Now he's my younger brother. And my mother just recently passed at 90. Well, I don't want to be in the position of getting like my dad was, who retired from the corporate job that he had, he had no other interests or likes or didn't feel comfortable. And so he ended up spending the rest of his days, either playing golf or sitting on the couch. And I didn't want that to be my epitaph. I didn't want that I wanted to that too. I wanted something more. I wanted to do something that could
Unknown Speaker 27:53
tell Kevin after your mom passed away, your dad just did that for how long?
Unknown Speaker 27:57
No, my dad died about 14 years ago, before your mom before my mom. But he the last, you know, seven or eight years of his life was just sitting around on the couch because he didn't know what to do with themselves. Wow. Yeah, he had a dream when he was a kid. But those dreams, you know, in those days, people felt like they had to go to work. They had to take care of their family. And that's what they didn't necessarily
Unknown Speaker 28:25
follow your dreams. You didn't like know, oh, you could really be an astronaut. They didn't really do that.
Unknown Speaker 28:30
No, I asked him about that. Because three months before he passed away, I did an interview with him. And, and I asked him specifically, I said, How come you never followed your dream? And he said, Well, I'm kind of a one trick pony. I can I can do one thing. But that's really pretty much all I can do. And I said, No, you're so much more than that. And he said, No, I'm going I'm really not. Because he had in his mind and decided decided that he could not do and lead his life the way he wanted to. So when he passed away, it was like there was nothing else for him to do here. Because he didn't feel I want I want to when I pass away, I want to do it like my mom did, which was she played bridge on Wednesday night. She went out to dinner on Thursday night. She went home on Friday passed away. And she was supposed to party on Saturday. And so she had a full life from beginning to end. And that's that's what I want to be able to do. I want to be able to, I want to be able to like talk to you or someone like you to our audience, and then go home and die.
Unknown Speaker 29:44
I'm gonna feel really great about that. Thanks. It won't be you I promise. I don't know what happened. I'm feeling
Unknown Speaker 29:51
great today. So so but but that's that's what I think that we are destined to live our lives to be full and complete and If you can't do it by yourself, you need to go talk to Carrie because she can help you understand that you can do these things and steps by step by step of how to get that done. That's because that's what you do now.
Unknown Speaker 30:13
But you know what, it's what you're like what you were saying about your dad is so true about so many people, we know that like leading lives of quiet desperation, you know that quote, it's that your dad didn't believe that he could do anything more. And it didn't matter what you said you couldn't convince him. And even now, like when I'm trying to think about my stepdad who he's been my dad for 50 years. And I'm like, What is he going to do? Because really, my mom is the one that you know, does all of the my mother does miniatures. So she goes to the shows, and she has, she has like another whole life pretty much my mom now. But my dad would kind of tag along with her. So I'm like, Oh, I wonder what my dad is going to do now. So I have a feeling it's going to end up doing not even the golf and Gavin just like sitting around watching TV. So it actually makes me sad. But I think my dad is like your dad, though. He just decided like, this is how life is. And it's more of a it's more of a fixed mindset, I would say it's the mindset where this is the way life is I can't really do anything about it. And you know, it could also sort of be a little bit of a victim mentality sometimes, you know, but the truth is, is it's really what our mindset is and how we were raised, and especially that generation, like my dad is 80 I'm not going to necessarily be able to teach him I could try to help him, you know. But um, what I do think is true, though, is you get to decide you get to decide if you want to live a life like Kevin decide where he wants to just live his life every day till you know till the last day, I always joke around, you know, like, I want to go to the beach, go on the ocean, read my book and drop dead. I also want a pile of books there. Even though I'm on the beach, I figure it's my last day, I'm going to just like wreck those books. And I can tell you, you know, I love books, but on my last day if I want to be surrounded by them, but the at the beach, I'm going to have to sacrifice a few. But you know, right now when I'm going through a little bit of a hard time with my mom, you know, it's that I've learned all this new terminology. Kevin, I learned there's a thing called Gray Divorce. I learned that's any divorce over 50. So technically, even if I get a divorce now it would be a great divorce. But one thing that happens with great divorce is that the adult children a lot of times do struggle, because I was like, I think it's so weird that I'm struggling. I teach this stuff. I have five kids, one of my kids just got engaged. I like have a full life. I shouldn't be so sad, you know. But um, the reason is, is because it's everything. It's your it's your everything that you're used to, you know, and I just I do find it interesting. And it'll be interesting to watch my dad, what will he do and my mom, but I do think it's, for me at least more valuable to live like my mom does, where there's always another life to lead at any age. Because what are you going to do just sit and watch TV, you know. And right now when I'm in this more below stage where I feel like a little down. I also understand this is what life is like, you know, so I do think one thing that's good about getting older Kevin is you realize, sometimes you go into a low point, but it goes back up again, you know. So I always think it's good to pay attention to how you're feeling. And then if you're having a problem in your life, notice it, and then do the things you need to do to get yourself through that period of time. You know, but what was your dad's dream, I'm just curious.
Unknown Speaker 33:25
He was when he was younger, he was a scratch golfer. So that means that he was caught up, he was what was called a scratch golfer, meaning that he had no handicap so he was a really, really, really good at doing that. And he really wanted to do that for a living. But then he of course in those days he married my mom when he was 21 Yeah, and she was 19 they had my my older sister when she when he was 23 And so at that point, you know he was in his mind his life was cooked go do anything that he wanted to do because he had the responsibility for the kids but had he wanted to do something he could have done it like you've got five kids and then you're still able to to work in negotiate through that
Unknown Speaker 34:13
he felt like he needed to be secure to like make sure that the family had a secure and you know what, this is something that is true though because what I suggest is someone say you have a career that you don't love what I suggest to them to just like oh let me just drop everything and go to this dream that I have I don't actually suggest that some people would suggest that some people would say absolutely drop everything and put your all into it because they would feel more like that would push them you know to make sure that they can make it work because they have to support themselves. For me though I prefer keeping the job you have and then just developing a little side job you said you did it at one point you know you had like a radio show going you know and you can do something on the side but even someone like your dad or my dad or my mom, at any age, you could pick up a hobby that you had. So at least he did go back to the golfing though, Kevin,
Unknown Speaker 35:06
you know? Yeah, no, he did. And but
Unknown Speaker 35:08
that's a community too. So we had at least
Unknown Speaker 35:11
exactly, oh, it was it was like it was another job for him. Because he would go like three or four days a week, and, and have coffee and talk to the guys play around a golf play gin in the afternoon. And that and that's how, that's how he occupied his time. So which, which was good for him, but I just wanted to make let you know that before I started doing the radio show full time, I did it two nights a week for a couple hours each night at another radio station and tell my employer found out about it. And they said, You're not gonna, we're not gonna, you're not gonna be able to do that anymore. Because you know, you're working here and you can't do that. And then the universe conspired to turn it around so that I could do it all the way that I was supposed to write. That's from my standpoint, you allow the universe to you ask the universe to help you or God or whatever, when your angels whatever it is, and you ask them to help you and and they will. And they honestly will. By the way, we're talking with Carrie Fisher I have to take a really quick break. I hope you don't mind but but you are you're just awesome. And if you go to Carrie Fisher coaching that calm, you can find out all about her you can sign up for her courses and and meet with her and stuff like that. So you're listening to positive talk radio right here on KK and w 11:50am. And we'll be right back after like these two and a half minutes. It's just two and a half minutes. We'll be right back. Don't go anywhere. Hey there. I'm excited that you're listening right now. And if you like what we're doing here, you're gonna love positive talk radio dotnet on positive talk radio dotnet. Each show which is recorded live is packed with positive information with real people discussing real issues and positive solutions that can work for everyone. I hope that you'll join us on positive talk radio dotnet and listen to all 340 Plus shows. I think it's worth your time. That's just me that's positive talk radio dotnet your home for great progressive positive podcast.
Unknown Speaker 37:18
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Unknown Speaker 37:52
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Unknown Speaker 38:45
and welcome back to positive doc radio here on KK and w 11:50am. We have a great show for you today. I did want to make a mention though, that I've been doing some research on podcasts and and doing them live and video casts and all of that. I found out that less than 10% of podcasts are actually done live like we do it like we're having a conversation here. And, and video like 5% of them are video so we are in the top few percent because we do everything live. And we have great gas and you have a wonderful smile and you'll be able to see that because you can go to YouTube and my independents are positive talk radio on YouTube. That's the old one. My independence report positive talk radio on YouTube and you'll be able to see her smiling face so so please do that. Carrie Fisher is her name Carrie Fisher coaching.com is the place to go to find her. She is extraordinary at doing everything that can help you live your your best life and I like the way that you say that. We'll live the best lives today and then everybody can
Unknown Speaker 39:58
well the best life that Your most extraordinary life, a life that you dream of. And one of the main things I teach people is that first, they need to really define what an extraordinary quality of life or what an extraordinary life really is, you know, because one of the reasons that certain people like you, and I got to a certain age and said, Wow, is this all there is, is because we were maybe using other people's definitions of what a great life would be. So society, teachers, parents, you know, Kevin, we, we think it's our thoughts, but it's really not, it's what we've taken on from, you know, everything around us. So first, you define what is a great lifestyle for me, and it's helpful to not look at other people's lives when you do that, or if you are looking at their lives, just for inspiration, not for to make yourself feel terrible.
Unknown Speaker 40:52
Exactly. Well, you know, it's, it's interesting, because, and you're right, we when we are growing up, and the word in our developmental years, we tend to look at the people around us for an example of what an extraordinary life is. But I when I was 23, wanted to be an actor. And I wanted to be on you to go to Hollywood and, and to study and then to do all of that, but I wasn't able to because I had this, this person who was, you know, like my fiancee, girlfriend, sort of thing. And so I couldn't do both. So I had to make a decision. And at that time, the decision was to go ahead and get married, have a couple of kids and do all that. But it's amazing how it all came together and kind of ended all at the same time that it was able to work. So I could do this now. So it'll be you know, so but that's that's what we do. When we're growing up. We you know, you get married, you have the kids, you do all of that you have a career. It's hard sometimes to follow your heart when you're young, because you're everybody tells you no, no, no, you can't do that. How are you gonna make any money, no money, make some money, being an author, nobody you know, and doing and doing what you're doing is extraordinary. And you're helping people to understand that they can do it too, which is the big thing.
Unknown Speaker 42:20
Well, also, there is no set path when you decide to go off and you know, leave the safety and security of the world, we all know that we want to have a house, we want to be able to support ourselves and our children and you know, send our kids to college if we you know if they want to go. So there really is always that tension between this safety and security and then following your dreams. But I do think that there's a way to move towards your dreams, no matter where you are in your life, you know. So for me, I would start out always for everybody listening, I always want people to leave with like an actual tool that they could use, I would suggest starting with the morning routine. So my first book is called tools for extraordinary living. This is the original cover, I have a new cover that I had designed that will be coming out. It's the first in this book series that I wrote on tools for extraordinary living. So this one's called the snooze button sessions. It's all about a morning routine. The next one is called routines for extraordinary living where I teach you some other routines throughout the day. And then the last one will be mindset mastery, which is more of like a peak performance book. But so the morning routine is something I think everyone should start the day with. And it could be as simple as five minutes. So you take something you're already doing Kevin, which is listening to your alarm go off, the alarm goes off, you hit the alarm, and you sit up and you do something good for you. So it could be journaling, it could be thinking of some things that you're grateful for, it could be just noticing how you're feeling today, just until the alarm goes off again, and you start your day that way you can meditate in the morning. So the very first routine or tool that you could use to start changing your life is starting your day in a positive way. And what's great about it is when you start your day like that, first of all, everyone wakes up in the morning, right? So you have well fully everyone wakes up if you don't you don't have to obviously worry about that. But usually people use an alarm to wake up. And even if you don't even if you wake up naturally, you could still do this technique. The minute you wake up that to the moment that you do the task, not it's I don't want to call it a task. But that's the moment that you do your technique. So you do your stretching or five minutes of exercise. And you would be shocked how good you feel, even if you just do five minutes of exercise in the morning. Because then you've just started your day doing something good for yourself. Instead of starting your day hitting your snooze button 10 times and then waking up late and rushing around like a lunatic, right? So even if you started doing that tomorrow, you'll start to notice changes because what happens is you start to feel a little better in one area of your life and it starts to leach out into the rest of your day into the rest of your week, month year. And then that's how you really start to create a really great lifestyle. So Kevin, let me ask you because you started off saying that you don't like to get up early. So what about you? Do you have a morning routine? And if not, I challenge you to start one tomorrow,
Unknown Speaker 45:13
I should start, I need to start one tomorrow, you are correct. You could
Unknown Speaker 45:17
just pick up a book, it doesn't have to be a My technique is good, because it's what you like, you could put a five minute song on, you could just listen to music five minutes, when you first wake up, it's just anything that makes you feel good first thing.
Unknown Speaker 45:31
I think that's a wonderful idea, because I love music. And I love listening to that. And I love reading and stuff. So I will do that. So the next time you come onto the show,
Unknown Speaker 45:40
yeah, I'm gonna ask you, I'm not going to forget, I expected to do it. Whenever I give speeches about it, I tell people, I want them to do it for one full year, and then message me, but I haven't gotten any messages yet.
Unknown Speaker 45:53
Well, it takes they call it I think they call it discipline. And you know, you've got to be a little discipline, in your approach. If you want to accomplish anything, if you want to do
Unknown Speaker 46:04
this, right. And you have to be easy on yourself. So like during the pandemic, at a certain point, I wasn't doing a morning routine, because I didn't even really have to get up. However, it didn't even matter what I did. But I started doing it again now. And what happens is, you pick up some of these tools, you use them when you need them. And then when you don't need them, you put them back into your tool chest. So maybe there'll be periods of your life that you do, you know, a half an hour morning routine, maybe there are times that you do a five minute one, or maybe there's times that you don't do it, you know, but what I also advocate is, even if you stopped doing something, let's say you decide you want to journal every day for a year, but then you stop. When you realize you stop, just start again, people get so upset with themselves. And like I found and I wanted to be better at this. And it's instead you could just start it again.
Unknown Speaker 46:57
You know, I was talking to a author coach the other day. And she said, and I think this is true for all of us is like, if you want to be an author, if you want to write something, write $500 or 500 words a day. 500 words might take you 1520 minutes to do, do voice to text, do whatever you want to do to do that. But do it every day. And at the end of 30 days, you're going to have 15,000 words. And that's that's a 200 page book.
Unknown Speaker 47:27
I committed myself let the January 1 of last year I committed I would write one blog every single day on a platform that community I'm part of. I wrote one blog every single day. And it had to be something I just thought of it couldn't be something I had like stockpiled in my computer, something that I noticed an insight that I had that day. So it was actually really cool. So I wrote one every single day, at the end of the year, I had like 10s of 1000s of pages that I had written my writing from the beginning till the end of that one year, it got so much better just from writing. And I realized, Oh, I could really write a book. And that's the reason I was able to write the book because I decided a writer writes, I did it every single day. But at least that one blog I would write it would take me 510 15 minutes. And it really is amazing. You know, if you want to write a book, for instance, if you write one chapter a month, you will have a book in one year. And a chapter. It could be a page a day that you have to write only do you know,
Unknown Speaker 48:24
oh, yeah, yeah. And you. So if you have a mind that you want to do that, but you're always saying to yourself, no, I can't sit down and write you know, you know, I know a 14 year old author, she writes 2000 words an hour. Wow. Which I thought was pretty remarkable. She's got like nine or 10 books out. She's 15 now. Wow, really? That's so cool. Yeah, her name is Shaun T. Washington, if you'd like to if you'd like to do
Unknown Speaker 48:51
monto, that's neat. I love that she does that. Yeah. And
Unknown Speaker 48:55
she's got an 800 page book, one of them, which is a trilogy. And she's got two others following that. Wow. She's a great young lady. And, and stuff. But Jen, and she'll tell you, it's just a matter of sitting down and doing it.
Unknown Speaker 49:08
You have to do it. Yeah. But that's what everything though, right? So when I say start meditation, like literally, even if you're listening right now, just stop for a second and pay attention to what you're thinking about. You can meditate for one minute right now. Pay attention to your breathing, do something even right this minute, you can think of three things you're grateful for, you know, that's, that's a technique to change your, your mindset, you know, there's so many ways that you could do it. And the problem is we don't do it. You know, how many times do you know that if you just go sit outside for 20 minutes, you're gonna feel better, but you just don't do it, you know?
Unknown Speaker 49:40
Right. And you can but you just for whatever reason. And we have to start thinking in terms of, if we want to live the best life that we can we have to make, you know, there are some incremental changes we have to make, and we can do it.
Unknown Speaker 49:54
Like you don't want to sit on your couch. You want to learn how to become a better and better broadcaster. So each day You're just building your skills, you know?
Unknown Speaker 50:02
Exactly, exactly. By the way, we are talking with Carrie Fisher, and go to fairy Carrie Fisher coaching.com. Kara, we're going to run out of time, sadly, but I want to give you an opportunity to tell our audience anything that you would like them to know, those that are listening now, and there are, and those that will be listening in the future, because this will be up on positive talk radio dotnet forever, and, and also YouTube. And so tell them anything that you would like them to know,
Unknown Speaker 50:35
I would like them to know, for anyone listening, I would like you to know that you can become the very best version of yourself. You can live the life, the extraordinary life that you desire. But it is going to take some radical honesty with yourself to figure out what you really want some radical authenticity, and then this is not as popular. You have to roll up your sleeves and get to work. And every day, take a few steps towards that dream that you imagine.
Unknown Speaker 51:09
You can't do it just by Andy, I had another journey. I'm so lucky, I get to interview all these great people. And he said, you know, you've heard of the Law of Attraction course. Yeah. And the law of attraction doesn't work by itself, you can't sit on the couch. And you can't say I've got a vision board. And my vision board says that I want a boat. And so I'm going to put the boat on the vision board, and I'm going to sit on the couch, and suddenly, a boats going to appear in my driveway. I'm sorry, ladies and gentlemen. What you do, what you must do, if you choose to, if you want to get that boat, you say I'm going to put the boat on the vision board and then I'm going to work my ass off to get
Unknown Speaker 51:54
exactly let the boat be a reminder, the picture of the boat is just a reminder of I need to go do something to get that.
Unknown Speaker 52:04
I'm going to do whatever I must in order to get that vote and I'm going to work my little
Unknown Speaker 52:10
picture into a real item. I'm going to need to make some steps.
Unknown Speaker 52:17
You can't you can't nothing is it there's that expression. Nothing in life is free. Exactly. And you've got to earn your little bits and stuff. But you can you and you can and the universe I trust me. I know for a fact the universe will support you. If you put it out there and then you're willing to work at it. The Universe regardless of what it is, will support you in your passion. Because that's why you came here.
Unknown Speaker 52:42
That's right, you just can't give up.
Unknown Speaker 52:45
Giving up is not in the cards and you're from New York and New Yorkers never give up.
Unknown Speaker 52:49
Don't give up. We just keep going. Thank you so much, Kevin. It was so nice talking with you. You're a great guy. I really enjoy you.
Unknown Speaker 52:57
Well, thank you. I enjoy you too. And Nancy, you've got a beautiful smile and you've got a great presence and your energy is terrific. And I implore people to work with you. Because I think I think although I know you're writing right now but when
Unknown Speaker 53:12
you buy my books, they're on Amazon The first one is called tools for extraordinary living the snooze button sessions in the next one will be coming out in the next couple of weeks called routines for extraordinary living you could just look up my name now or look at look me up on Instagram. I am Carrie Fisher comm you can find me there.
Unknown Speaker 53:30
I am Carrie Fisher i By the way, you know we're doing lots of shorts now. than putting them on Instagram and stuff. So don't be surprised if we send you a message saying that we've created a short for you. And it's on positive talk radio.
Unknown Speaker 53:48
Yeah, who knows, maybe we'll work together and you'll do some work for me. I always need everything that you were talking about all of the all of the commercials and all of the marketing stuff.
Unknown Speaker 53:58
Yeah, really is fun. We've got all of the stuff that we can do now and and, and I really, you know, life life for me, life is going just extraordinarily well. I love
Unknown Speaker 54:10
that. That's what happens when you open a new door guy. So pick up a new hobby, make a new choice. Do something different today that brings you joy.
Unknown Speaker 54:20
That's the key. Find something that brings you joy that you really enjoy doing and this is what this is what I do. I just love doing this. I'm doing this all day every day. And to me it just makes my heart sing. Carrie Fisher has been our guest thank you for being here. And I've got just less than a minute. So Benny, are you still? Are you still there?
Unknown Speaker 54:45
Yes, I am Kevin.
Unknown Speaker 54:46
Oh, he woke up. Alarm. Yeah. I just wanted to add from the bottom of my heart, Benny. Now we're moving to three o'clock on Monday afternoon. But I wanted to say thank you very much have been nothing less than a superb professional and like my show for the last year and I think
Unknown Speaker 55:06
you said when you weren't on
Unknown Speaker 55:09
I appreciate it Kevin always here for you, sir.
Unknown Speaker 55:12
And there's a possibility that I may come back who knows. I just appreciate you and I just wanted I wanted to share that with you and our listeners that you are, you are top notch. You are terrific. Thank you. And by the way, everybody, do something nice for yourself. Do something nice for somebody else be kind, because you know each other's all we got. So we'll see you Wednesday at four o'clock of Basel.